WONDERFUL LIFE, WONDERFUL LIFE, WONDERFUL LIFE,,

That's right. That's right. That..s

I'm kind of trembling at the moment. Everything I've got to feel guilty for. I thought I should make a list, a note-whatever-of everything over history that made me feel guilty
so I can remember, and so I can remember. It's all pretty much from my childhood because that's when I knew how to feel guilty. I can't remember everything now, so there will be more posts over time.

So, here's a start. The guilt monologues.

Number one.
I can remember barely anything, actually. Oh. One day, me and my friends were going to the cinema. It was pizza hut, cinema. There was a suggestion that someone should buy a dvd...south park. or a cartoon. or something that none of us, under 12, would be able to buy.

BUT IF WE PUT OUR HOODS UP!!!!

and the cinema film was shit. it was shit. I think it was star trek, I don't remember but it was shit. and I didn't have any money, so I took a ten pound note out of my mother's purse. and I was caught. and I felt guilty. because it was a sin.sin.sin.

I had half a bag of popcorn. I threw it in the bin.

Number two.

School, break time. Dares and no, no dares. Just me in the toilets. I jumped into a cubicle and -I was 10, I think- and hung from the wall, by my fingers. I didn't know that there was someone on the other side. They shouted. I locked the door. And I waited, as there were crowds. and baying and people saying 'who, who, who' and I came out, and I blamed it on someone else. and they took it. and they took it.

Number three.

School, again. On the bus, there was a room at the bottom. Exclusive and small and a little hideaway from the old kids at the back and the too young kids at the front. and we didn't like ED, and we thought

ok ok ok

this is a good idea, pranks and there's ice and we'll play some tricks.

so we unfastened the bolts-something, I don't know bikes. my bike cost me a fiver from a reclaim store- and waited to hear tomorrow when he fell.

he fell. the deputy headmaster gathered us on the bus. and everyone knew it was us. and my stomach was death. and we explained, I explained, liver on my tongue that we didn't know. we didn't know. and we got away with it.

I saw ED the other week in a train station. I didn't say hello.

Three for now. More later.

...let's go out and make some guilt.