WE MADE OUR OWN COMPUTER OUT OF MACARONI PIECES

I never look into mirrors. For this reason.

i'm going to start exercising again.

after years of doing nothing, I saw cellulite on my bum

and vanity aside, (vanity is always aside)

I don't want to slip and become one of those people who I always judge for letting themselves go whilst eating a muffin/strawberries and cream frapuccino from Starbucks. Venti.

They're probably drinking a skinny latté.

I hate people who drink skinny lattés.

They always emphasise the skinny when they order.

'Hello shopkeep. I would like a skinny latté, please. Yes, that's a small, skinny latté.'

and I also hate it when the barista asks me whether I want cream on top of my frapuccino. I'm clearly not drinking a frappucino to be healthy. I clearly don't care about being healthy. Or else I would order a skinny latté, please. I don't see why the café people...with the eyes! Always judging with their eyes when I say...'Yeah. Of course I want whipped cream.' A frappucino is not a health drink. It's not a wheatgrass and lemon smoothie. It's cream. A lot of cream and sugar in a plastic cup.

ANYWAY. I'm going to start exercising again.

Starting now. And my bum will be delicious.

And I will still have the whipped cream, thank you very much.

And my bum will be delicious.